Something from Me

One of the battles that conquistadores of knowledge partake in is with their own egos. I struggled with Parelli in the beginning because it frustrated me that all these answers were just being given to me. I felt like I was cheating. I'd had plans to learn all of this by myself! I didn't want to be handed the solutions to my equations. The only way I could make myself comfortable with the home study program was to realize it was my ego talking (I wanted to be able to say "I did it by myself.") and to see that by taking this route, I would be able to go further faster. Going it alone, I might by 60 before I figured everything out that I could figure out by time I was 20 if I followed this path.

However, I still want to contribute. I want to come up with a new idea that I have never heard before. I don't care if someone else has already done it, I just want to know that I can come up with something that I have never seen. So while I was talking with Maggie the other day, I thought of something.

I did not write it down. I will have to ask Maggie if she remembers what it was. When (if) I remember, I will post about it. I just wanted to remind myself of it before I completely forget I had an idea.

On that note, another truth that has come to me is that without exception, every individual will make "the" journey their own journey. Even if they don't have many original ideas, no two journeys will be the same. I wrote my journey down and I have watched others who are in the same program as me, and theirs were different from mine. That makes me feel better.

In the end, I need to do this for my horses. Ego has to be set aside. I don't care how I get to where my horses need me to be. It is quite opposite of the "I don't care how I get my horses to where I want them to be" mentality I see in a handful of horse owners. I hope my horses know that I am thinking for them and not for me.

Natural Horsewoman Out.